Starletta's MisAdventures

WHY DO WE FEAR WHAT WE WANT TO BECOME?

Sat, 11 Aug 2007 02:30:58 GMT

WHY, do I never become what I want to be? All my life I've been the pretty girl that's shy. The girl that gets bullied by or dragged down by other women because of their jealousy. And I've always been the one who hates drama, and defending themselves until my emotions get too strong and I EXPLODE--sometimes on the wrong person.

Why, I am I like this? I'm in the process of looking for a new job and I'm tired of the same shit happening: girls being mean to me, feeling shy, and placed as the pretty but shy girl that gets ignored by far more outgoing (most of the time slutty) girls. At my last job everyone talked about me behind my back or talked about me in near range: " That girl Ashley is really strange," "She's weird" "She act's so old" "Oh she's so quiet she never talks." Not only the comments I had to deal with, but the fact that they would try to take my sales.

At my other sales job the same thing happened-- people trying to take my sales and talk shit. I know its jealously because I'm very good at sales, and they want to bring me down to make me FALL-- AND IT WORKS !!! AM I STILL BURNED FROM BEING TEASED ALL MY LIFE THAT I'M STUCK THIS WAY?

I WANT OUT.. I WANT TO BE THE HOT GIRL WHO IS OUTGOING WHO ATTRACTS ALL THE GUYS--NOT JUST GHETTO BLACK AND LATINO GUYS. I WANT TO BE THE GIRL THAT STANDS UP FOR HERSELF, THAT LETS HERSELF GO AND KNOWS HOW TO HAVE FUN. I WANT REAL FRIENDS, A REAL SOCIAL LIFE, AND DATES WITH REAL MEN NOT BOYS!!!!

So why do I fall back into the trap, maybe because it's so comfortable to be a loser instead of a winner. Maybe I'm so used to be being oppressed for so long that I can not see the beauty I have become--on the inside and out. I'm the fat girl w/ pig tails and glasses in elementary school--but I still act like it sometimes.

Why is confidence so easy for others? I'm just tired of it and something needs to change. How can I deal with mean, bitchy coworkers without the fear of getting fired?

P.S. at my last horrible job even my manager bullied me-- I ended up quitting without resigning. :(

I just need to learn to be a stronger person, I need to let go of my fear. At work I'm so afraid of saying the wrong thing in losing my job. When it comes to guys I feel I can't compete.

I NEED TO BRING SEXYBACK!!!... I DESERVE SO MUCH MORE!

WHY DO WE FEAR WHAT WE WANT TO BECOME?

Sat, 11 Aug 2007 02:28:10 GMT

WHY, do I never become what I want to be? All my life I've been the pretty girl that's shy. The girl that gets bullied by or dragged down by other women because of their jealousy. And I've always been the one who hates drama, and defending themselves until my emotions get too strong and I EXPLOD--sometimes on the wrong person.

Why, I am I like this? I'm in the process of looking for a new job and I'm tired of the same shit happening: girls being mean to me, feeling shy, and placed as the pretty but shy girl that gets ignored by far more outgoing (most of the time slutty) girls. At my last job everyone talked about me behind my back or talked about me in near range: " That girl Ashley is really strange," "She's weird" "She act's so old" "Oh she's so quiet she never talks." Not only the comments I had to deal with, but the fact that they would try to take my sales.

At my other sales job the same thing happened-- people trying to take my sales and talk shit. I know its jealously because I'm very good at sales, and they want to bring me down to make me FALL-- AND IT WORKS !!! AM I STILL BURNED FROM BEING TEASED ALL MY LIFE THAT I'M STUCK THIS WAY?

I WANT OUT.. I WANT TO BE THE HOT GIRL WHO IS OUTGOING WHO ATTRACTS ALL THE GUYS--NOT JUST GHETTO BLACK AND LATINO GUYS. I WANT TO BE THE GIRL THAT STANDS UP FOR HERSELF, THAT LETS HERSELF GO AND KNOWS HOW TO HAVE FUN. I WANT REAL FRIENDS, A REAL SOCIAL LIFE, AND DATES WITH REAL MEN NOT BOYS!!!!

So why do I fall back into the trap, maybe because it's so comfortable to be a loser instead of a winner. Maybe I'm so used to be being oppressed for so long that I can not see the beauty I have become--on the inside and out. I'm the fat girl w/ pig tails and glasses in elementary school--but I still act like it sometimes.

Why is confidence so easy for others? I'm just tired of it and something needs to change. How can I deal with mean, bitchy coworkers without the fear of getting fired?

P.S. at my last horrible job even my manager builled me-- I ended up quitting without resigning. :(

Who's UR IDeal Mate?

Fri, 10 Aug 2007 20:19:40 GMT

First of all before I even date a guy he MUST have a car (no hoopdy) , way more financially stable than I, have stable job/career, have own place-- doesn't have to live by himself long as he doesn't live with (mom,dad,aunt,uncle,grandma,grandpa), and no drug dealers or hardcore abuser of any drugs.

So anyway past the requirements, I would like him to :

Like mostly Rock music, but likes other genre's as well
Open-minded and Independent in his own thoughts--- (I like guys who are different)
at least 5'7 + (but if really hot then at least 5'6)
Outgoing, but not flirtatious
Confident but not cocky or extremely blunt
Likes movies, concerts, going out to eat, enjoys the Arts, but most importantly REALLY GOOD MUSIC
Good dresser (or decent dresser will do as long as they look like they care)
Not cheap

Hot Guy List: Pharrell Williams, Trent Reznor, Ville Valo, old skool Brandon Davis, Christian Bale, Chris Evans, Daimean of OK GO, Seth Green, Edward Norton, Alan Rickman(OK SUE YES HE IS OLD AS HELL), Dave Grohl, Dr. MCSteamy... okay I have too many to list!!

* I'm tired of dating guys who are always broke, who always ask me for money or some type of help, who live at home with their momma, and if and when they get money are cheap as hell. Also I'm tired of dating cocky, blunt asshole's who think they know everything--and think their the shit!!

The Interview

Fri, 10 Aug 2007 19:50:05 GMT

Ugh, I don't know if I did really bad or what, but I was extremely nervous. My interview was at 10:30am, and their was an older guy being interviewed before me.. very professional looking. The look of the other candidate made me even more nervous. So soon its my turn and I'm even more nervous but I try to fake it. The Hiring Manager looked over my resume, told me what the company did and then asked me if I had any questions, and then he asked me why I think I would be a good candidate. I DON'T remember a thing I really said, I did tell him I was nervous. He was joking with me and everything, and the interview was over in 8 minutes!! I go "That was fast," and he said "That doesn't always mean a bad thing."

In the end I don't want the job you only get paid once you laid a deal and it's commission.

P.S. The Hiring Manager did tell me someone would be in contact with me. Bad news: only one slot up..so who knows I guess :(

Thanks for everyone wishing me well, and I'll find something if I don't get this so I'm not worried :)

Sorry I've been so boring Lately

Wed, 08 Aug 2007 21:35:01 GMT

Everyone is on vaction or busy working. I haven't been to the gym in a month. I stay up late and go to bed till 3am. I have shit to do, I'm so broke and bored.

BUT ANYWHOOO,friends I have a job interview as a ADVERTISING SALES REP for a Magazine tommorow. The transition to Bellevue University is going good: 47 credits transfered, and I have 2 general education classes left, but need to know what to do about electives.

SO NEW JOB (I PRAY TO GET IT), NEW SCHOOL.. MY 21ST YEAR ON THIS EARTH IS STARTING OFF GOOD!!!!

How Long does it Take to find a Good Job???

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 20:56:29 GMT

I've never had to wait more than 3 days to a week to hear from a job prospect, granted all my past jobs have been shitty retail jobs w/ high turnover (probably why I didn't have to wait so long). Last Friday, I applied to a bunch of jobs on Hotjobs.com, I also applied to the DMV, and I was also thinking of applying for this job near the airport. I'm kind of freaking out because I feel I might not be picked for a real job, and I'm really not a patient person. I'm going to follow up on all my jobs Friday, and then if I don't get called in for an interview I will apply to work w/ a Temp Agency. If all fails with them I can try Best Buy or Money Clip magazine (it's sales so I'm making that my last resort).

I wish I had connections, because if I did I wouldn't have to wait for a long to hear if I got the job or not.

Magazine Covers: Updated

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 17:57:51 GMT

Gwen Doesn't look like a Tranny to me?? I find this photo pretty, but her facial expression is blah.
* EDITED: MAYBE I'M JUST IN LOVE WITH HER SHINY LONG HAIR? THE TAN GIVES HER A TROPEZ LOOK.

Harry's a hot guy, but they photoshopped his face to death!

I know We've all atleast Once seen these Ads-- I know I have.

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 02:22:35 GMT

Awesome Job or Devious Scam?

By Kate Lorenz, CareerBuilder.com.

Anyone who has ever looked for a job has certainly seen countless ads that simply sound too good to be true. What do these ads look like? They probably included phrases such as:

Make $4,000 a Week from Home -- No Sales!

No experience necessary!

Earn $35,000 - $50,000 a year working part-time!

Sounds great, right? Well, like most things in life, if it seems too good to be true, it usually is.

From envelope-stuffing schemes to mystery shopper promotions, the world of scam ads is wide and complex. The problem with many work-at-home schemes is that they require the worker to spend their own money to get started, and once they do, there's often no return on investment. In many cases, you will have to foot the bill for supplies, starter kits, training and more. Other situations that claim to be "easy money with no sales" often do involve a great deal of sales work in challenging environments.

Sheila Adkins, spokesperson for the Council of Better Business Bureaus, says that while there are some credible work-at-home opportunities out there, many of these ads are not the real thing. "It's very hard to find a legitimate work-at-home opportunity through an ad like these."

Adkins says there are clues that can help you figure out if an ad is a great opportunity or a dangerous scam.

1. Be Alert for Red Flags.
"One sure red flag is when you review the ad and it does not say specifically what the work will be," she says. Another, is the phrase "no experience necessary," especially when coupled with the promise of big money. Promises like these should tell you right away that the opportunity is not legitimate. Be cautious, too, of any companies that operate outside the country.

2. Do Your Research.
If you are trying to sort the good from the bad, Adkins says you have to do a little investigative work. She suggests checking with the Better Business Bureau, your state's Attorney General, and other state business offices to see if the company is licensed and registered to do business in your state. Most fraudulent companies will not go through the work of filling out the paperwork and registering with the appropriate organizations.

3. Insist on a Face-to-Face Meeting.
If the company representative wants to conduct all business with you via e-mail, phone and fax, look out. Adkins says you should always ask for a face-to-face meeting before taking on a business opportunity.

4. Don't Give out Personal Information.
Many con artists use business opportunity schemes to gather personal information for identity theft. You should never give out information like your Social Security number or bank account number, especially over the phone or online.

5. Look Out For "Pay to Play" Opportunities.
"Beware of any company that requires money to be sent or involves large startup costs," Adkins says. Yes, there are some work-at-home opportunities that are legitimate and require an initial investment, such as selling Mary Kay cosmetics or Avon products. But Adkins points out that these are established companies that have been around for years and have positive reputations.

6. Ask lots of questions.
If you have found a possible opportunity and have scheduled a face-to-face meeting, Adkins says you need to be prepared to ask many questions, including:

Who will be paying me?

How often will I be paid?

What exactly will I be doing?

Is this contract-based or permanent work?

Where is your company's physical location?

Does your company operate under any other names?

What is the total cost for me to participate in this program?

What is your company's privacy policy?

If you are not satisfied with answers to any of these questions, then simply walk away. Even if you are, take time to verify what they told you.

Yes, many people do earn a living working from home. But it is important to understand that most of these individuals are working in a field in which they already have experience. Establishing a home-based business takes a lot of work, dedication, contacts and time. If a company tells you that you can make it to the top immediately, you are probably better off moving on to the next opportunity.

Kate Lorenz is the article and advice editor for CareerBuilder.com. She's an expert in job search strategy, career management, hiring trends and workplace issues.

JOB SCAMS!!: RIP OFF REPORT

Tue, 07 Aug 2007 01:16:26 GMT

Today I was contacted by 3 Illegal Companies:

1.) TIDEWATER EVENTS INC. AKA SECOND STREET MARKETING
2.) TOOSPOILED.INC/ONCE WORLD VOICE, USA VOICE
(and a bunch of other names)
3.) INTERNATIONAL READERS LEAGUE AKA ACTIVE PERIODICALS.

Tidewater Events Inc. = I keep seeing their ads on HotJobs.com and Monster.com, they claimed to be an award winning Marketing company who specialized in working w/ Nonprofit organizations that deal w/ Child Safety. Since I had an interest, I called them (that’s what the ad said do), but then the receptionist said "GO ONLINE FILL OUT THE APPLICATION AND IF YOU ARE QUALIFIED SOMEONE WILL CONTACT YOU FOR AN INTERVIEW." Well today I got an email saying that I got approved for an interview and then 30 minutes later they called me -- I did not answer instead let them leave a message.

From what I researched online they don't exist I can't find one Press Release or Photo proof of any events they claim to sponsor, plus on indeed.com a person said that they went by two names --- I RESEARCHED and they sure do, with same contact info!!!

TooSpoiled.INC = I received and email today saying that I had be selected for the Site Moderator position based on my qualifications and search the employer did on HotJobs.com. They are a scam too they pay their employee's commission only or not at all. They claim to be a Talent Agency, but again they are false.

Readers International League = they just called my house; my dad picked up and told them I was asleep. Then he saw that I was downstairs told me "Oh, I thought you were asleep Readers International something called, I told them you were asleep. Did you order books or something?" I told him no, and started immediately researching in internet = SCAM NO.3. Their like some Publisher's Clearance House crap.

ANYWAY, I WROTE THIS POST TO WARN OTHER PEOPLE ABOUT THESE ORGANIZATIONS: THEY ARE OUT THERE LIVE & WELL TARGETING MOSTLY YOUNG FOLKS, BUT ANYONE DESPERATE AND NATIVE ENOUGH TO LISTEN!!

- They even sign up under the Better Business Bureau, but never are members-

Links:
Job Scam: TooSpoiled.Com
Rip Off Report: Active Periodicals & Int'l Readers League
Rip Off Report: Tidewater Events

Questionnaire: What's the Best thing about Being 21??

Sun, 05 Aug 2007 22:22:56 GMT

ANYWHOO, I'm going to the Element Lounge for my bday, any RICHMOND friends ever been to this place?

I want to drink some Mjitos and Martini's...wee..

1.) SO WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER THE BEST THING ABOUT BEING 21?
2.)WHAT DID YOU DO FOR MY 21ST BIRTHDAY? and....
3.)DO YOU STILL SOMETIMES WISH YOU WERE A TEENAGER, AND IF SO WHY?

I'm about to turn 21 next following Tuesday (the 14th), and I am so excited!! I feel like a new beginning is coming soon, plus I'll be able to do more things social wise. I also don't feel like such a kid anymore, thank god--sometimes I feel like an old woman trapped w/ a face of a 16 year old.

I finally found a Layout that I like..yay

Sun, 05 Aug 2007 07:51:30 GMT

I just changed my layout from OJ and Toasty to Tiki Purple, I haven't been on Livejournal for so long I've forgot how to do my own layout so this one will have to do for now.

If anyone would could help me create my own layout I'll greatly appreciate it! BTW, I do have Adobe Photoshop and used to be good at Graphic Design, I just need some guidance (mostly w/ HTML).

I've been M.I.A. for a couple of days.. BUT Back!!

Sun, 05 Aug 2007 07:27:49 GMT

Well the only thing new with me is that I found a school that I want to go to besides VCU. I just don't like VCU or any school in the state of Virginia. I wanted to go to LIM in NYC, but $40,000 a year is ridiculously insane!! So a couple of days ago I went on collegeboard.com and went looking for colleges that had campuses, but also full online degree programs. And I found Bellevue University, I already paid the $50 application fee and signed up for Advertising Management.

ONLY problem is that next week VCU is supposed to be sending me my financial aid money, I'll take the grant but I don't want the loans anymore. I can't get into my major at Bellevue , until I get 60 credits-- so I wouldn't mind taking the grant money to take a few classes I need.

I also don't know how my mom will react, I don't know if she'll be angry or what. One year at Bellevue for 07-08 is $$11,000something dollars, a lot compared to VCU's $$6,000something. But by going to Bellevue I'll be able to get into Advertising w/o all the hard Gen. Ed requirements, and most importantly I'll be able to have a life!!! I can't sit around just going to school while being broke-- PLUS all my friends WORK. Ever since I've graduated from High School my social life has improved but is still shit. Most of my friends work and are engaged (WEIRD I know I'm only 20), so I don't see them much.?

* I updated my FASA w/ the Bellevue info, I have filled out the Financial Aid form for the school, but I guess I should?? Should I even though I'll probably end up taking the rest of my lower-level classes at my old Community College? I guess everything just depends on how many classes I still need to take, and also how much money I can get for free (LOL).

* I've also applied for full-time jobs so hopefully I'll get a good one.

BTW THANKS FOR ALL THE POSITIVE FEEDBACK FROM MY LAST TWO POSTS !!!

I don't wanna go to VCU :(

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 05:54:21 GMT

I'm worried about fitting in at VCU I really want to meet new people, but I feel like I will fail. I am not a typical college student 1)I dress more professional and dressier 2) I feel and act older than what I am.

I don't really want to go to VCU at all,the campus is TOO BIG but I can't afford anything else. This sucks I really am dreading this school , and already want to leave as fast as I can :( No one seems friendly and the classes for general education are huge.

ERR, I feel like a failure if I had did well in H.S. I could have gotten a scholarship outside of VA.

*Sorry for ranting, I don't want people's pity or attention

I'm Upset with Myself.

Wed, 01 Aug 2007 01:32:37 GMT

I'm upset I never seem to do the things I need to do, or to do them when I'm supposed to..fast enough. Maybe it's a sign of immaturity that I'm still clinging onto my teenage years instead of being an adult. I just don't understand why I let myself down so much. I’m such a huge procrastinator. I also don't get why I wake up not wanting to go anywhere, feeling as though I have gone everywhere.

I'm also upset at myself for the shitty friends I have sometimes, and all the bad dates I've gotten. I complain to my friends that I'm bored, but they still never want to do anything with me. I don't get it, how come I keep making friends w/ women who just want to work their butts off then, smile all up in their boyfriend’s faces forgetting the world? Can I meet one Singleton like me-- a girl who wants to have fun, and want to be tied down to a relationship & get all domesticated. I'm 20 years old and I never knew that my social life was going to take such a nose-dive :( I need new friends, but I'm just scared the new one's I might meet (if any at all) will be just like the rest.

The only reason I EVER dated someone is because my friends always dissed me and rarely wanted to hang out. Or because the friends I've had never want to do the things I want to do-- because they don't have an interest or the money. If I had good friends and a good social life I seriously admit I don't think I would ever have a boyfriend. Only reason why I dated was to be around the company of somebody that wanted my company. And look where that's gotten me, I always say "yes" to the 1st guy that approaches me, every guy I've dated has been an asshole. A controlling, commitment phob, and they NEVER share the same interests I have. I wake up in the morning all I can think of is going places to meet and find men, but the thing is I don't want a boyfriend I want FRIENDSHIP. I WANT A SEX AND THE CITY GROUP OF GALS TO HANG W/... I don't have that and I end up not going anywhere. What's the point of going to the grocery store in a tight fitted top and jeans---that doesn't help my social life??

God, I just don't get it am I FREAK... am I so utterly boring that female or gay male companionship is out of the question? Why is it so hard for me to find people to go out with?? Every chick I meet is stuck up her boyfriend's ass. Is this how the real world is, from now on am I SUPPOSED to be searching for my soul mate-- is he the one and only one who's going to spend time with me? If had a good friends I would have never dated Lance. I get so angry at myself I HATE MY LIFE.I HATE IT.. AND SOMETIMES I WANT TO CALL MY SO CALLED FRIENDS ON THE PHONE AND CURSE THEM THE FUCK OUT. HOW COULD THEY DO THIS TO ME?? WHY DO THEY ONLY CARE ABOUT GETTING MARRIED???? OR THE ONES THAT ARE SINGLE WHY DO THEY ALWAYS SAY THAT THEIR BUSY W/ WORK AND THEIR FAMILIES?

BUT MAYBE I BRING IT ON MYSELF…. I sometimes cancel on them a lot, but it’s only cuz I get depressed of doing the same damn thing over and over—movies, mall, out to eat (soo boring) :( Am I spoiled or something because I always have money to go out ---and I ALWAYS have time to do stuff?

I'm also upset that I can never start my diet, what is wrong w/me I just end up doing nothing w/my life. When I wake up in the morning there is nothing for me to do--- I'm not rich enough where I can just go shopping all the time. How many times can I simple go out to eat, lunch, or the movies. I want concerts--Broadway shows, art shows, comedy clubs..etc

My Girl Made the Cover of Aussie Vouge

Mon, 30 Jul 2007 19:08:23 GMT

Yay, I'm so glad she won the competition of AusNTM instead of Steph; she's more realistic looking as far as model wise. She was pretty, but way too short, and all the pictures I've seen of her have been very amateur looking. People wanted Steph to win because she was more outgoing, but this show is about modeling not Pageantry.

Side note: You looks like a thinner red head version of Christy Turlington in this picture atleast.

Here she looks like model Lily Cole.

Why do we Date those who R so Wrong for us?

Mon, 30 Jul 2007 01:54:51 GMT

So I wake up this morning to find on the kitchen table the ad for the $15 hr job my mom was taking about the had says 3-5 yrs Clerical Office experience needed-- I have none. I told my mom this and she said it doesn't matter, but I don't know if I really want this job. If I got it I would only be able to take two classes at VCU, both would be evening. I'm already one level below what I'm supposed to be (Jr.). School is very important to me and so is my social life -- odd I know.

Anyway, Lance called me again from Jail today and ever since finding out that Collect Calls from Jail are $3.50 each I have not picked up the phone. I feel bad for not doing it, but Lance always does this: When he's in need or down he always wants me around, when he's doing better he never has time for him. I can recall countless times where he's given me a snob story, I fall for it and then he returns back to his dickhead self. My friend Tiffany say's maybe he'll change or has changed now since going to Jail. I DOUBT IT; he is a very sneaky, selfish human being if you can't do anything for him he doesn't want you around. I dated him for 8 months to be constantly told “There are plenty of girls that will do what you want." I don't know why I wasted my time on the 1st guy I met from being out of a previous relationship -- I feel like such a dummy !!

Lance never had a License (It got suspended) and he didn't have a car, and he always had money problems and my stupid ass in the beginning always helped him out-- but it was NEVER enough. He knew I was too good for him, so when I would break it off each time he would become a BIG CRY BABY: "Oh I'm so sorry," "I'm lonely w/o you," "I love you please take me back." I mean I let his ass drive around w/ my car and he had the audacity to smoke inside my car-- and he ended up getting me in trouble w/ my mom. I would tell him "LANCE DONT SMOKE IT MY CAR IT LEAVES A SMELL," and he would go “NO IT DOESN'T AND PLUS I HAVE THIS SPRAY YOU CANT SMELL ANYTHING."

ERR just thinking about him makes me mad I wasn't so much time being in a relationship that was on the level of 9th grade. Plus he was a huge liar also and very secretive. NOW he wants my pity because he's locked up in Jail for 3 months basically lifeless. I don't care to hear anymore stories about how he messes me, wants to die, is lonely w/o me because they'll all turn into " WHEN ARE YOU COMING TO SEE ME!!" and the more famous....." I NEED MONEY!" Plus even though he was Black and had the stereotypical BIG BLACK PENIS he was bad a sex, he could never figure out which hole to put it in. GOD I MUST HAVE BEEN BORED SO BORED AND LONELY..ERR :(

What's Your Love Stage?

Sun, 29 Jul 2007 00:10:05 GMT

"How does a woman's relationship status affect their behavior? "

The Free Agent"

LoveStage: Single and not looking

Your top priority: Are you busy starting a business? Raising a kid? Writing a best seller? Whatever your focus, the majority of you said "obtaining knowledge," not finding Mr. Right, is your goal right now.

Your bottom line: Financially, you think long-term.
Fiscally ambitious, you're also the thriftiest of the LoveStages in the here and now. In fact, you're decidedly anti-impulse buy, spending 30 percent less than any other group on clothing, shoes, or La Perla.

Fun fact: Hot wheels, not hot dates? Free Agents are more likely to invest in a new car in the next 12 months than any other LoveStage.

Celeb poster child: George Clooney

"The Connector"

LoveStage: Single and looking

Your top priority: Meeting new people, natch. You log four times as many hours on MySpace (and other social networking sites) as any other LoveStage. But you're a networker extraordinaire, and there to meet all types, not just eligible ones.

Your bottom line: Well, you never met an espadrille you didn't like.
Connectors spend 17 percent more on shoes than any other LoveStage -- not to mention 23 percent more on clothing. We understand. Dating requires frequent costume changes.

Fun fact: Be your best friend? Connectors ranked their pals as a higher priority than romantic success or their appearance. You also beat out every other LoveStage when it comes to career satisfaction!

Celeb poster child: Jennifer Aniston

"The seeker"

LoveStage: Dating, but not exclusively

Your top priority: Self-improvement. Seventy-three percent of you are trying to Google your way to enlightenment, going online for info on bettering yourself. And one in five is currently seeing a therapist, twice as many as any other LoveStage.

Your bottom line: Subject to change: 44 percent of you say you intend to look for a new job in the next year. Maybe that time off helps explain why you watch the most talk shows.

Fun fact: More pro-gym than any other LoveStage, 16 percent of you practice yoga or Pilates regularly. Overall, you tend to exercise more often than singletons or the committed, and 300 percent more than those going through a breakup! Paging Ben and Jerry.

Celeb poster child: Jessica Biel

"The Entertainer"

LoveStage: Dating someone exclusively

Your top priority: Now that you're in a cozy twosome, most of you say you wish you had more time to socialize and exercise. (Yet nearly half of you say you "never think" about dieting.)

Your bottom line: It's budget reallocation time: In this stage of dating, you tend to spend 20 percent more than average on movies, dinners, concert tickets, and -- call it the Xbox effect -- 35 percent of you say you're also suddenly shelling out more on electronics.

Fun fact: Got your eye on a diamond? Twenty-three percent of you say you are expecting to get engaged within the next 12 months. Pre-congrats!

Celeb poster children: Beyonce and Jay-Z

"The Tween"

LoveStage: Between relationships (due to a breakup, separation, or divorce)

Your top priority: Connecting with friends. Fire up your Friendster! Women in transition are two to three times more likely than others to network online. You're also most likely of all the LoveStages to be on Instant Messenger 24/7. Good 4 u!

Your bottom line: How's that lip-gloss collection? You're investing in yourself to feel good again, and most likely of all the LoveStages to engage in beauty-product binges.

Fun fact: Can an espresso maker cure a broken heart? It's not scientifically proven, but investing in new sheets and dishes is a good start: One in three of you said you're in the market for new housewares now.

Celeb poster child: Reese Witherspoon

"The Nester"

LoveStage: Engaged

Your top priority: Building your nest, of course. You're dropping 20 percent more than any other LoveStage on home products. We're with you. In our heart of hearts, we all want 1,000 threadcount sheets.

Your bottom line: Make that lines. Fifty-eight percent of engaged couples living together combine bank accounts. Yet, 62 percent of you choose to keep your plastic one-name only.

Fun fact: Back away from the Lifetime movie: You're the most likely of any LoveStage to say you're feeling more emotional now than ever before. You also use photo-sharing sites and go to the movies most often.

Celeb poster children: Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery

"The Nouveau wife"

LoveStage: Married

Your top priority: You're the happiest with your work/life balance now. Less than 12 percent of you say you plan to change jobs anytime soon. But one in 10 of you do plan to have a baby in the next 12 months.

Your bottom line: Going toward good eats. Today, married women spend more on dining out than any other LoveStage. Take that, Betty Crocker.

Fun fact: Have husband, will travel. Seventy percent of you plan to jet off into the sunset on vacation soon. Isn't it nice to have a built-in someone to rub sunscreen on your back?

Celeb poster children: Julianne Moore and Bart Freundlich

[ I would say that currently right now I am at the "CONNECTOR" stage, when I date i like to be "THE ENTERTAINER"--WELL be entertained ;) ]

Takeout Take In.

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 23:54:10 GMT

Why do I always plan to do tons of things and then end up doing nothing? I woke up today and all I did today was clean my car and get takeout from Applebee's. I had:

PARMESAN TILAPIA

Tender, grilled tilapia sprinkled with a garlic Parmesan crumb topping and served with almond rice pilaf, fresh seasonal vegetables and toasted side bread

GRILLED SHRIMP SKEWERS

Later on I'll finish cleaning my room and read a couple chapters in the new/last Harry Potter book. I can never find anything to do thats interesting-- I mean how many times can I go to the mall, or go out to eat? I would go to concerts but interesting people rarely come to RVA. I need a new hobby and a new man too...maybe I'll try the following:

          ---   Get into Golf (lots of men play golf)
          --- Start my own Magazine/Website
          --- Make my own fragrances to sell (I have like 10 bottles of essential oils I never used)
          --- Find job that is also socially satisfying

Oh BTW my mom wants me to go to school part-time or not at all because some place is hiring, no experience needed for around $15.00 starting wage. I don't know if I should do it?

My Dad is Bitching...

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 18:07:05 GMT

My dad is having a bitch fit about me and my mom never helping him keep the house clean. I think he's just pissed that my mom planned a family cookout the year he had to recover from hip surgery. I don't get me wrong both my mom are very messy, and I still don't get why my mom let her uncle talk her into having a cookout-- especially at our house. We have three weeks before the cookout and their is a lot to be done. My dad is still very upset about having to have hip surgery-- he hates the fact that he has to be independent on other people, and not be able to boss them around or control things.

I had hip surgery's well but last year and I wasn't nearly as bitchy as my dad, he's way too hard on himself. Maybe thats where I get my personality from-- my aggression from my mom and my bitchiness from my dad (lol just joking..well maybe).

These is the only reason why I hate myself for not being more serious with my money ... I really need to move out and find my own place. I mean yeah my parents are cool in small doses, but they still annoy me. nag nag nag about this about that, always having something to say. Like my dad told me " YOU CANT BE GOING TO THE GYM WORKIN OUT 5 DAYS A WEEK YOUR BODY WILL EXHAUST," and I told him that I could as long as I take a break on the 6th day, I didn't even go into the fact that it all depends on what type of exercises you do.

* In all I need to: clean my room (childish I know I should be a more neat person), my car (thanks to my old job having me put makeup on), go find something somewhere to eat for dinner, call around on Monday (or maybe today)and see which Best Buy's are hiring.

Writer's Block: In The Money

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 06:48:06 GMT

If you won $100 this afternoon, what would you do with it?

* Boring ...but I would put it in saving account : I've spent so much money on clothes and other superficial crap that I need all the money I can get right now :(

The Short Beginning

Sat, 28 Jul 2007 02:19:48 GMT

I never thought I was nothing and I'm here to change that. This journal is for the personal development of myself and if I can influence others in the process so be it. Here is the story of me: Growing up I always felt different, more mature than my peers and more open-minded then everyone else. My whole life has consisted of me being the black sheep at school and within my family. As I've gotten older the name calling has stopped, but people still don't understand me. As I get older also I have realized that it might not be me that is the "weird" one but everyone else.

Just because I'm Black doesn't mean I can't eat and love sushi, or love listening rock or find guys outside my race more attractive. All my past relationships have been with Blacks who want to change me, who could never accept me. They always made fun of the food I liked to eat and the clothes or I liked to wear... they wish I acted "Blacker".

I am who I am and I love sooo many different things and I wish I could be more understood. Because of constantly teasing and feeling misunderstood it has caused me to be more withdrawn. I'm still a very happy outgoing person, but I stay to myself. Time and time again I have tried to find real friends that actually wanna do stuff and hang out-- but have failed, so many times I have tried to find a guy to love me for me and to like atleast SOME of the things I like -- but only have found failure.

I WILL NOT GIVE UP. I BELIEVE IN LOVE AND THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE WHO WILL LIKE ME FOR ME, FLAWS AND ALL.

I'll be a transfer this fall at a 4 yr university, and I'm looking for a new job.. so my journey awaits!!!!!